Discussing your book

Uhhhhhh...want to see an otherwise functional and intelligent adult morph into a babbling toddler? Yeah. I get cold sweats whenever random strangers/acquaintances ask: "Ohhhh you're a writer? So what is your book about?" It is more nerve-wracking than pitching to an agent. I mean...with an agent, I'm kinda already expecting the agent to either ignore me or reject me on the spot. Querying is very impersonal. However one-on-one conversations are nothing like that at all! You're forced to answer that one-on-one question with a one-sentence summary. "My book is about the Salem Witch Trials, Voodoo, slavery, lesbians, and um...werewolves?" 

This, of course, is followed by another question: "So who are your characters? What's the point?" I have two choices. I can continue the snarky route OR I can actually try to explain what my book is about. 9 times out of 10 I say something snarky because there's nothing more ANNOYING than a self-absorbed writer giving a long soliloquy about their fucking book. I refuse to be that writer. I really do. If I ever get famous (ha!) you're not going to find me on NPR droning on and on. I can't stand that! And I'm kinda uncomfortable talking about my book anyway. I care more about it than this random person and I don't want to waste their time discussing racial, feminist, LGBT politics. 

I need to be better at talking about my book to people...face-to-face. Perhaps I should say: "It's Toni Morrison meets Quentin Tarantino!" so they can scratch their heads and slowly back away from me. I've already decided on a "dedication" to put at the front of the book. "Dedicated to all the Pecolas and Preciouses of the world who found the teeth to bite back!" Yeah. I like the sound of that. 

Going for gold

Have you guys been watching the Olympics? Gosh, I always cry when I watch these athletes. I guess I'm just an over inflated bag of estrogen and sentimentalism. I was so impressed by little Gabby Douglas! She and the Fab 5 won gold for USA! Hurray! 

The Olympics shows everyone what we all can strive to be. It's about doing amazing things and accomplishing greatness. It's inspiring. I feel some of that can-do spirit has brushed off on me. Got a full request in my inbox. Go USA!

Ouch, Smash, Rejection!

So I got my first rejection on my full manuscript. Had to happen sooner or later, but ouch, smash, break! That's the sound of my ego hitting the hard fucking floor. I'm honored I caught the attention of a NY time's best selling agent from a major literary agency in the first place. And, um, the fact my rejection was open-ended: "would you be willing to revise/resubmit or do you have any other material for me to review?" should make me happy. But it doesn't. 


I don't know. I guess this tells me I'm a good writer. The agent said so herself. But she thought there was too much gore and fantastical elements. Subjective criticisms. Fair enough. And I'm not taking it personally, but still... 


I guess I'm just looking for some love from the horror community. It's such a hard sell these days. And at times I feel unappreciated as a horror writer. I'm not a traditional hack-n-slash type. Nor am I  a psychological thriller either. I blend horror, the supernatural, fantasy, and just general "hard-to-define-ness" to my stories. I don't like being boxed into a single genre, and I think that shows in my writing. 


Sticking to your guns is a hard thing to do. If I was so desperate to be published, I would write some cheesy YA urban fantasy about a boring white suburban girl and her equally boring but predictable half-vampire/werewolf/zombie/dragon/whatever-the-hell-ever boyfriend. Of course all of the characters would be straight. And I wouldn't even bother trying to incorporate feminism, racial/sexual identity, or social politics into the subtextual plot. Teenagers don't think. Like duh. Totally whatever, right?


I have a voice. And one day someone will listen to it. I never set out to be a NY times bestseller or super famous. I just want someone...ANYONE to listen to me. To show that I exist. That I was here. That's all.


To be fair, the agent who rejected me mentioned none of these sociopolitical issues as a factor. Strange, she didn't even bring it up. In fact, she asked me to write a Voodoo-themed YA story for her. I'm bitching about two completely unrelated topics: an under appreciation for horror AND political fiction. Anyway, I'm keeping the ball rolling on these queries. This grueling, soul-draining process... Onwards I go! 

Querying for dummies

Querying is time-consuming. And annoying. And degrading. And demoralizing. You're practically groveling to someone who is more than likely too busy to respond to you anyway, so yeah. There's a reason so many writers loathe this part of the submission stage. But if you're smart (and I'm assuming you are since you read my blog) you can make the most out of this horrendous process. 

Break out the note-taking materials, I will be giving a pop quiz later.

1. Familiarize yourself with sites like QueryShark and Nathan Bransford. Study them. Memorize them. Find other blogs/sites that resonate with you while you learn the mechanics of writing the actual query letter itself. Find successful queries that resulted int full-requests. I personally recommend THIS SITE. 

2. Use the appropriate search engines to find your agents. Publisher's Marketplace, QueryTracker, and AgentQuery are all good choices. 

3. Once you select an agent DO YOUR RESEARCH and check their agency's website, past clients, interviews, etc. Just because Publisher's Marketplace lists "horror" under your agent's name, does not necessarily mean your agent is actively looking for horror at this time. Study the sort of books your agent has represented in the past and make sure you read their submission guidelines first!   

3. Personalize your queries. I realize this is a pain to do--but trust me, your chances of getting a full request are greatly improved if you study your agent's likes and dislikes  before sending off your query. 

4. Write multiple versions of your query letter. Pick the strongest one. Then seek the advice of fellow writers (preferably the writers who beta'd your novel) and revise, revise, revise, revise! This query letter is the only obstacle standing in the way of you getting published, so make sure your query is as strong as possible!

5. You've finished writing the damned thing and your query has been polished to perfection. Congratulations. The hard work is over and all that there's left to do is pull up your big girl panties and mail them off. Expect rejections but stay optimistic. Keep in mind most agents adopt a "no response means NO" approach. So if your agent is nice enough to tell you you've been rejected DO NOT act like an asshole and demand answers for why. Be professional at all times. 

6. So by now you've been rejected by 25 different agents. Chin up. There's still hope. Explore small-press publishing or even self-publishing. There are many ways to get your novel published nowadays. Take these rejections as an opportunity to polish up your MS while you think of a plan B. 


If you have any tips or useful resources to share with us, please don't hesitate to enlighten the blogosphere with your comment! 

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