Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Getting my conch pierced

Sounds dirty, doesn't it? But it isn't as sexy as it sounds. The conch is located in your ear, minions. Get your mind out of the gutter, will ya? Gonna get the piercing done at Cat Tattoo over in Addison. They got this $25 special on Wednesdays. Lately I've been feeling like crap so I think getting the piercing will cheer me up some. *sigh* I even know the jewelry I'm gonna put in my conch. 

Expensive...but I love opals! 

Monday, May 28, 2012

Strange Fruit

Nina, my goddess. Thank you. 

Friday, May 25, 2012

Smexxxy Friday

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Ashton gets PWN'D

Let's all just agree; brown face, yellow face, red face, black face...still not cool, America. Got it? Get it? Good. 

Monday, May 21, 2012

Living in an apartment

So many new neighbors moving in lately. And most of them have dogs. I like dogs...don't get me wrong. But there's just so much poop now in the yard. Clean up after your dogs, people! It's not that hard to get a frickin' bag and put the poo in the doggy bin thingy that is located just a few paces away. Smh. Neighbors. I might go on a killing spree soon and end my sobriety. It's been more than a year since I've eaten human flesh...I'm feeling antsy!


Friday, May 18, 2012

Smexxxy Friday (What What In the Butt)

Title pretty much sums it up. Thank you South Park. Bwaahahaha! Total win.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Gothic Horror

OK, minions, time for another horror lesson. Today we're going to learn about gothic horror. Why? Because I said so.

So what is gothic horror, anyway? It's kind of hard to describe but people generally know what it is when they see it. Some popular writers of the genre include: Edgar Allan Poe, Alfred Hitchcock, Bram Stoker, Mary Shelley, H.P. Lovecraft, Anne Rice, and more. Basically gothic horror writers don't write the hack-n-slash zombie-eating stuff. Gothic horror is much more...psychological, and often there is a sexual subtext within the plot. I prefer gothic horror to the unsophisticated splatter-fests so many writers rely on today.

Basic tenets of gothic horror:
1. Setting. Usually the story takes place in a dark creepy castle, or a haunted building, or a forbidden forest. Often there is lots of fog, rain, and snow. A constant foreboding atmosphere must saturate the other characters. Think Sleepy Hollow, The Phantom of the Opera, The Fall of the House of Usher. You get the idea. Setting is important to create that dark moody presence.

2. The Damsel In Distress. She's very easy to spot. She's the fragile white woman who is constantly fainting. Or crying. Or getting kidnapped. She's been phased out in most modern gothic stories but remnants of this delicate creature still exist. Guillermo del Toro's gothic fantasy, Pan's Labyrinth, uses a little girl for this role. Ophelia.

Women play a big part in gothic novels. Often they are the victims of whatever supernatural/horrific situation taking place. In my novel, I make fun of the "damsel in distress" archetype by making my heroine the "monster" (anti-hero?) of the story. My heroine falls in love with a weepy damsel in distress, but instead of being "pure" and "virginal" like most female victims, she uses her perceived helplessness to sexually/emotionally manipulate my main character.

3. The Tyrannical Male and or Villain. Yin and Yang, my friends. If there is a helpless female character cringing in terror, there HAS to be a powerful male standing over her, right? Every gothic horror has an evil villain: Dracula, Norman Bates, Roger Chillingworth, Claude Frollo, etc. In modern gothic horror stories, the Tyrannical Male can be a woman, such as Kathy Bates' character in Stephen King's, Misery. Fuck, I still can't watch this scene without groaning or flinching away! Aghhhh! *cringe* 

The Tyrannical Male pursues and captures the damsel for selfish reasons. His motivations for tormenting her aren't always sexual...but most of the time it is. In my novel, there are three Tyrannical Males; one that represents a common "evil theme" of the gothic genre. There's the Reverend (who represents the corruption of Religion/Morality), the jealous Fiancé (for the violent sexual nature of masculinity), and finally the Magistrate (the corruption of Law/Society). Gothic horror shows us where society has "gone wrong," often using speculative themes to carry out the message. Which brings me to #4.

4. The Supernatural. Magic, prophecies, demons, ancestral curses, forbidden places, hauntings and the like fill the pages of many gothic novels. Once society has "fallen," the rules of nature attempt to balance itself in some way by punishing the "fallen society" with supernatural monsters. The Supernatural element can/and often is the Anti-hero or Tyrannical Male of the story. Think Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Beast (from Beauty and the Beast), Lestat, Quasimodo, Dracula, The Headless Horseman, etc. The supernatural element serves a psychological/metaphorical purpose. It isn't just put there to be "cool." Most trendy urban fantasy or paranormal novels today wouldn't be considered "gothic" for this reason. *facepalm* Just cuz your story has a werewolf, zombie, or a glittery vampire, doesn't make your novel "gothic," alright? There's a difference. Gothic is more...literary. But it's kickass literary fiction. 
OK. That's enough on gothic horror. I think you guys get the idea, yeah? I think I'm going to re-watch Alfred Hitchkock's Psycho just for the hell of it. Happy writing, minons! 

Monday, May 14, 2012

More on querying...

Q: What do you do when you're waiting to hear back from agents? 

A: You start another project so you don't go crazy checking your inbox ever 5min!!!! I think the waiting around for a response is actually worse than receiving the "Dear Author" form letter! 

I'm starting to realize why so many writers get depressed during the query process. You gotta be made of steel to survive in this business, I swear! This is my first time querying agents. Like ever. So I'm learning a lot. I didn't know what my emotional limitations were until I started this process. Although there are days I just feel like chucking my laptop out my window and giving up, I remember that even the greatest writers (like my personal heroes, Chuck Palahniuk, Sylvia Plath, Edgar Allan Poe) struggled to find an agent and be recognized at first. LINKY LINK

Look at this rejection letter for Ursula K. Le Guin!!!! 

So for all you writers out there plodding through the query process, I raise my glass to you! Keep at it, comrades! Don't give up! 

Friday, May 11, 2012

Smexxxy Friday

Now that my boyfriend is working from home, we've been having a lot more sex recently. He's buying a new pack of condoms every other week. Fuck. I guess I really need to start on the pill. 

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Smdh. This shit doesn't deserve a title.

Really, Johnny Depp? Really? And I JUST wrote a post about this very topic last week. Like seriously. Smdh. And why the FUCK is there a dead crow on his head???? Anybody???

If you haven't heard already, read up on the Tonto disaster.  And if that link doesn't meet your fancy, try THIS ONE. What the hell were these people thinking??? Omigod. *headdesk* 

Over and out. 

Monday, May 7, 2012

Crushing on your characters...

I kinda sorta have the hots for one of my characters. I didn't want to fall in love with him...but the pull was just too damn strong! Haha! How many writers have found themselves in similar situations? I'm sure I'm not the only one. After all, as writers we base our characters on people/ideas we like. I happen to like mature, serious-minded introverts with kickass fighting abilities and or a biting sarcasm.    

So here is the combination of characters who inspired the character in my novel. A little bit of Prince Ashitaka from the Studio Ghibli film, Princess Mononoke. Like my character, Ashitaka also falls for a reckless "Wolf Girl." 

A little bit of Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. Elizabeth may not be a "wolf girl" but Keira Knightly kinda looks like a shark with those teeth. So close enough. 

A little bit of Trinity from the movie, The Matrix. Although Neo is much more emotional than Trinity, her logical no-nonsense approach calms him down in stressful situations. She doesn't mince words and she's not afraid to challenge Neo when he's fucking up. Despite her aloofness, she is fiercely devoted to her man and will/does die for him! On top of that, she's so damn sexy isn't she? 

A little bit of Van Fanel from the anime series, Vision of Escaflowne. Van is complicated and he has some...uh... psychological issues. He's a little homicidal know, he has the whole "brooding anti-hero" thing going for him. Because he's an emotional retard, he keeps to himself and prefers not to deal with people unless he absolutely has to. Epic killing starts at 2:07. This whole scene is pretty dope. 
Last but not least, there's Seiji Amasawa from the Studio Ghibli movie, Whisper of the Heart. Seiji is so calm and mature for a 14-yr-old boy! I think I love Seiji the most out of this list. He's the most like my boyfriend. And Shizuku is most like myself. My character in my novel is not as sweet as Seiji, though. But like Seiji, he is mature enough to let the woman in his life make her own choices without trying to rush in and "fix" her mistakes. He is supportive in a quiet, behind-the-scenes kinda way. Only when the situation becomes desperate, will he actively assert himself and offer to "solve her problems." 

Friday, May 4, 2012

Smexxxy Friday

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Getting into Twitter

Social media is evil. Once you start using it it just sucks out your life force. I'm a reclusive person. I'm one of those writers who lives in an abandoned hut in the forest and never talks to people. I have a wreath of human skulls hanging from my door. I paint my shutters with clown blood. I talk to the empty walls in my house. And I have like...100 feral cats living in my basement. None of this is true. But yeah, I still consider myself to be a misanthropic hermit. 

I said NO to Facebook. Then NO to blogging. Then NO to tumblr. Then NO to twitter. And we see how that turned out, didn't we? But alas. Now that I'm querying agents, I decided it would only be in my best interest if I take up "teh twitter"and stalk their various twitter accounts. And you know what, Twitter isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be! I actually *gasp* LIKE using it!  Perhaps a little too much. 

I'm sure you minions have noticed the nifty little Twitter feed thingy on the righthand sidebar, yes? I'm still a n00b with yeah. I'm learning. *sigh* Anyway I think this blog post is enough social interaction for the day.

Over and out, minions. 
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